mother: is it a boy or a girl?
doctor: *puts baby between teeth* it’s a metaphor
date me to disappoint your parents
s cience tumblr why the hoobly boobly
nothing will fuck you up as much as the realization that there’s no real reason the alphabet needs to be in order
i like how when black widow takes a shower or wets her hair or whatever at falcon’s place her hair’s all wavy but she later has ruler straight hair, like does falcon own a straightener just to make his guests comfortable because that’s lovely
I love that feeling you get when you don’t remember that you’re reading. When you’re so captured by a book that you forget you’re reading the words. All you see is the descriptions and conversations that being to play out like a movie in your head. You don’t even think about it. Then before you know it, you’ve read 100 pages without realizing it. That’s probably the best feeling in the world.
pickup line: wanna watch this murder documentary with me?